MP 47

Matt: The stent is out. The fistula appears to have healed. I’ve been eating and drinking by mouth for the past month or so. And I am grateful.

The hoped for healing did not come about from the pig bladder tissue graft they applied last summer. There were a couple endoscopies last year to check the progress. Each time I was told that the fistula was looking better, but still there. In November 2025, the GI specialist applied a tack-and-suture system to help the fistula heal. It is unclear why this solution was not mentioned to me earlier in the year, but it seemed to do the trick.

Currently 30% of my calories come from tube feeding and 70% from food eaten by mouth. I’m perfectly content with this as I am at least able to return to some fiber-soluble nutrients from organic plants. There remains a small chance that the fistula could re-open so I limit my consumption to soft textured foods. In a month or so, if everything is going well, I will return to the GI doctor and he’ll remove my feeding tube in a simple office visit.

Some words that have had particular resonance recently:

“…it is easier to sail many thousand miles through cold and storm and cannibals, in a government ship, with five hundred men and boys to assist one, than it is to explore the private sea, the Atlantic and Pacific Ocean of one’s being alone.” – Walden, Henry David Thoreau

“Adonai is good to those waiting for him, to those who are seeking him out. It is good to wait patiently for the saving help of Adonai. It is good for a man to bear the yoke from his youth. Let him sit alone in silence when he has laid it on him. Let him submit absolutely; there may yet be hope. Let him offer his cheek to the one who strikes it, and receive his fill of insults. For rejection by Adonai does not last forever. He may cause grief, but he will take pity, in keeping with the greatness of his grace. For he does not arbitrarily torment or punish human beings.” – Lamentations 3:25-33

Lastly, we had to say goodbye to our dear canine friend Ramsay last November. It still hurts my heart. His breeding gave him a high guardian instinct which led us to develop new perspectives and skills as dog parents. We made the best life for him we could and I think he enjoyed being with us. He was nearly 14 years old.